Dealing with toodler

I’ve been reading a lot of articles about children’s behavior.  But what catches my eyes are the articles on dealing with your toddlers and  your behavior towards them.  My husband is working at home now to recuperate on his knee surgery.  He is the one who’s dealing with our 4 years old son, Nathan.  I am quite amazed on how he managed to let him eat his food properly whereas when I’m around the table (mostly during at night and weekends), he would whine at me to help him on his food and sometimes I can’t help but to assist him.  When all of their voice are becoming hoarse telling Nathan to stop doing this and that, I just sat there and doing nothing.  My reasons? They are all reprimanding him for doing something wrong and I don’t need to add to that.  I don’t want him to feel that his every move is wrong.   I’m wondering sometimes if that is right, if I’m doing it right.

I don’t what to lose control of myself when Nathan’s pushing all my buttons.  I regret the one time that I did and I don’t want to be into it again.  So I always keep saying to myself that he’s just curious and whenever you tell him not to do that, he will be more curious and so the never ending cycle begins.  One thing I noticed though, children easily forgives.  No matter how you yell your heart out, give him time out, received some spankings and hurt his feelings, after few minutes, he’d come to you hug you and say sorry for what he’s done and then you will look at him with no trace of hurt and he’s back playing.   And you will be left with the guilty feeling that there you are still seething with anger and he’s the one who’s trying to make amends.  I’ve learned a lot from Nathan.  We are learning from each other every day.  But, at the end of the day, he knows that we love him very much.  :)